I think of important things!!!! When I am not busy.

 So the guy keeps telling me, "Write!" Of course, you see, about what becomes the question when there is truly nothing happening, being that starkly dull time of year when winter will not loosen it's grip and Spring is illusionary.
" I have nothing/"
"Oh, oh, you have plenty of that!  Write about it!"
But somehow I thought that if I really did have plenty of nothing, that really didn't leave much to write about.  It is hard to make something out of nothing.  Fox News does it all the time....but mostly they make nothing out of nothing which is entirely a different matter altogether.  I could write a TV show about basically nothing, but Seinfeld has laid claim to that.  How about a play?  " Much Ado About Nothing.?  Now that sounds like a really slick title and I will do IT!  Maybe have it take place somewhere in Italyl
In the meantime........I decided to write a great America Novel......only...cheat.  See I figure if I just steal the last sentience from each chapeter of a great book.....why gosh, I would be on my way to ACTUALLY writing something....lemmee try it, see how it works....

Little Jackie made it stick, all right.
He was right about that.
They inspired confidence.
The parcel, unopened, traveled around with him from unfurnished room to furnished room to the apartment where he lived for awhile with his beautiful wife Lois until the time came when he just walked out the door and didn't ocme back; to other furnished rooms and hotel rooms, to a big squarish parcel with the brown paper turning to yellow and the cords sagging and the name Jack Burden slowly fading.
And we love truth.
For, looking at me, she slowly nodded.
If we believe the dreams we dream when we go there.
And the winter had been long.
It had beenthe funeral of Adam Stanton,down at Burden's Landing.
But that will be a long time from now, and soon now we shall go out of the house and go into the convulsion of  the world, out of history into history and the awful responsibility of Time.

...well, so much for that idea.  At least it made me think, even just a little.  It did remind me of a Blog I used to read a few years back.  The guy's real name was Al Weisel and he wrote under the name, Jon Swift.  Al died unexpectedly about three years ago...it was just a wonderful little thing, well crafted, satirical and witty...and everything he wrote seemed so full of, well, something.  I wish I could write like he did.

Jon Swift

I am a reasonable conservative who likes to write about politics and culture. Since the media is biased I get all my news from Fox News, Rush Limbaugh and Jay Leno monologues.

...Anyways...I still hae nothing.  Just so much air, is all.  Not that having air is such a bad thing...I recently had a small experience of what it is like to NOT have air and I would not recommend that to anyone.  Air is good....you can have thin air, and disappear into it, air can be thick with suspense and so thick you can cut it with a knife.  Clean air.  Foul air.  Good for a walk and catch the night air.  You can be lighter than air, fly through the air with the greatest of ease, fall right out of the air, but of course, you had to have been up in the air first or at least been walking on air.  Yupperz, air is a good thing, much better than nothing, yet it is still hard to put air down on paper.  Kind of like the wind, which is a good enought thing cause you really need to have some air if you want to have a little wind.
And wind is good.  It is rahter like air, only it blows.  Which is good, right?  I mean, how good would wind chimes be without wind? Sure would be a slow boat to China, too, without some wind.  And how can you 'go fly a kite' without a little wind?  Wind is almost as good as nothing, except wind really does do something...and it really cares a better description of what is going on.  When you say ;break wind' you know exactly what just happened...in which case it would be best to be up-wind, cause you would not want to get wind of it.

Reminds me of a joke by Danny Kaye in  The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, 

And the oboe it is clearly understood
Is an ill wind that no one blows good.

 Which makes you think.....Does and Ill wind take two aspirins and good to bed ?Yes, wind is good.  Except on Neptune.  Saw some show on some cable channel and this guy was talking about the winds on Neptune blow constantly  at 900mph which sure wouldn't be good for beach property I'm guessing, though 900 ph is getting close to Rachel Maddow.  OK, I like her, but gees, she sure does talk fast, rather like she forgot to pee before getting on the set and she really has to hurry.
which reminds me....just hold it...I'll be right back.

There, I feel much better.


It is just that time of year, I guess. Not much going on unless you really like Pope Elections or a college basketball tournament that now has some 86 or so teams.  Sheesh.


Well....I still got nothing, jjust dead wind and stale air.
Kinda like McCongress.
Can I get some fries with that legislation?

Wonder if there is any TV shows on tonight of great social significance or political importance?

well Zed

I got a message delivered yesterday via the moztly unreliable Billa Lang. Now, messages from Billa should always be taken seriously. They could be a matter of life and death or matters of cookies and milk, or he has discovered the Wisconsin field of Sacred Ginseng..  never know....or .they could be from the mafia....they could be from the Vatican...you never now.  This was serious.

Some irate elementary school teacher in the wild wild north of Wisco has threatened me with a whack of the ruler or even more heinous punishment if I do not cease using the letter 'Zed' interchangeably with the letter "Sss".
Now I just thought I was being fair with the alphabet and seeing as 'Zee', or 'Zed' to our Canadian cousins. is so under used that I would just give it some more fair play.  Nope.  Not supposed to do it.  Best not mess with Elementary teachers.  They can get nasty.AND....I am not to call it 'Zed' unless I am in Canada.  Boy&Howdy....some folks just don't want me to have fun....Nutz!

But it did get me thinnking a little....and in stead of just lying down and waiting for the thoughts to go away......well, just I thought of the last trip I took to the grocery store and how wonderful the labels on some food products were.  I especially liked "made with all natural by products."  Now that made me think I should not buy any items so labeled.  I mean...whoa....what is in that stuff!  Why don't they just label it with some truth like " This shit is made of so many disgusting things that if we named them all there is no way you would buy this"  That would really boost sales, huh! Ohohoh...and the other one that grabbed my attenion was a bag of "Fish Portions"! Now the good old 'fish portions' were on sale...buy one bag and get a second free...and it seemed like a good idea until  started to think of what "portion" of the fish that stuff could have been made of.  Then it didn't seem like such a good idea.
oh, the shelfs were full of stuff like that.....gluten free, no high fructose sugare (course they didn't say anything about low fructose sugar) and no saturated fats, and 'only natural flavors'.  Damn....see I was really looking for some thing with a lot of unnatural flavor and full of glutens and fructose and saturated with all sorts of fat.  Gees...whats a shopper to do?  Then I pickeded up some sauce.....

.......now how could I go wrong!  It waid it was 100% natural.....and it was 'Old World' Style; god forbid it would have been only 98% natural and 'Third World' style.....gees, then ANYTHING might be in there!!
Seriously.....what does "FLAVORED WITH MEAT" supposed to mean?  Did they dip a few bones in there while simmering? Did they stir in some all natural unsaturated meat by products?  Well, it sure as hell doesn't say anthing about REAL MEAT being in that stuff/!  ohohoh....and there were other things,,,,made of mostly food byproducts, whatever that could be, in all sorts of stuff.  There were emulsifiers, acids of all types, oils, starches, fibers of unknow origin.  I mean... you had to almost be a chemist to know what was in the stuff that I was goning to stuff into me!   And, as I wandered around that grocery store, less and less of what I was seeing was appetizing.  Hunger was starting to look like a good option.

But it got me to thinking, again.....of.....what if we could label Congress like we could food.....

"Mostly Artificial flavor and color"
"Unfit for Human Consumption"
"Suspected human by products"
"Made of Highly Saturated Stupid"
" No Moral Fiber"
"May cause bran farts"
"if ingested induce vomiting"
"Made of Simple carbohydrates. Do not recycle next election "
"100% reconstituted bullshit"
.........but thinking of Congress makes me want to drink until numb and I did not have enough for a six pack......the brussel sprouts looked good

...and I picked up some Zud.....it is great for scrubbing away Zins...but only venal ones. For Mortal Zins you have to wait until they elect a new Pope

Weather man blues

You don't need a weather man
To know which way the wind blows.

.....but sometimes it helps.
Woke up this morning feeling like a gang of malicious elves were clogg dancing on my back while wearing Clydesdale horse shoes.  Hurt is almost a joyful word compared to how it really felt.  But then...the Doc said that they slid a eight inch tube right down along the rib cage, and, well, golly it was gonna hurts for a bit and a bunch.  Live with it.  Now my first impulse was to pop another vicodin but I have been easing off on those suckers.   Kinda makes me dream of orange snakes sliding around in the jello.....and those were the dreams I had BEFORE I fell asleep.  Should put on label not to take them with Bourbon and glazed doughnuts.

So I turned on the weather channel......and OH....what they said!  Gonna be a snow Storm!  Kansas could get 36 inches....Oklahoma maybe 24.....  Missouri 18....Kansas is gonna get mega inches, Illinois a bunch inches.....and ohohoh...they are calling this Snowstorm 'Q" and I got all confused cause I could't remember snowstorm l-m-n-o-p and I thought they gave them real names, not just letters.  Like, what's wrong with snowstorm Quesadilla?   Just add cheese and go sledding, right?
Well the WeatherLady kept rattling off the inches and the WeatherMan interrupts and asks, "Is that a Heavy Wet or a Light and Fluffy?  Which broke me up.....see, I'm thinking all that talk of inches got him all worked up and he is looking at the WeatherLady like he was ready to do some plowing right now.  He had this look on his face that just broke me up......I think he had taken some Viagra so he would be ready for when the moment was 'right' and all this Wintery Mix talk was doing a number on him.  Well, I got a weird sense of humor and I starte laughing and it hurt my ribs....and golly....I settled for Vicodin and orange juice.
Stuff breaks me up.  The look on that guy's face broke me up.....just like that old Viagra ad...you know....the one were the guys are all so happy that they can finally get a real woody...and what do they do?  ?Sit around with each other and sing about it!!!!!!!!!

ya, that kinda shit always broke me up.  Gees, if they are T"HAT happy ...go home!!!!  Can't screw your banjo in a bar anywayz!
But what you can screw, iffen you can get it up...is the American public.  Oh...and there is a whole lotta that going on!  Start with Obama's choice of Sec of Defense, Chuck Hagel.  Well....the Republicans don't like him...mostly cause he used to be a Republican and a tlot more mostly cause he is Obama's Choice.  Shit, John CCain even admitted he won't vote for him because he said "GW Bush was the worst President since Herbert Hoover."  hmmmmmm  Well, McCain knows a thing or two about bad choices.

ohohoh....it still makes me shudder to think that woman was a blowjob heart beat away from the Vice-Presidency.  Oh Gees!~


....and now they are going to do this sequester thing.....mostly because....well.....because they don't like Obama.   They don't have a plan to balance the budget ...or do anything to help the country......but they have marching orders from Karl Rove and Grover Norquist and the Koch Bros.  The whole plan is simply to shut down all spending and emarass the president.

nah....that is too goddam mild.   The Republicans are just a buncha fools that think they invented the hard-on....yessirree bob.....they got dem low T blues, see, and they popped a pill that they didn't need and now they got an erection that may last well over four years...forget about that four hour stuff ....aw gees.....it really makes me sick....and I got the back pain coming on again, and the snowstorm Q....the weather people tell me....could last all day tomorrow.  I have gone to the library...all stocked up on Bob Dylan, Jimi, some Doors and som symphonic shit I haven't a clue about, but figure it will play good with some vicodin and a heating pad.  ah well......I am conna have my own little sequester and I ain't coming out untiol I elect David Letterman as Pope.

no time for blogging....

I read the news today, oh boy....

Whoa.....I guess I missed this....Pope Benedict resigns!  And, ... I didn't even know we had one!

I mean, I knew there was a Pope and all that, but I dina know he was German or that his Name was Benedict.....gees, I thought Pope Benedict was that thingee, ya know, poached eggs on a muffin topped with HolyDaz sauce. & anywayz...'poached' eggs?  Was de stolen or something? Stuff!
 Heard he was gonna open up a day camp for Wayward Choir Boys.






Next Pope should be a nice Italian boy.... I think Pope Vito the Skinny would be a good name.  Offer you a sin you can't refuse.








Ohohoh....then I heard that some Carnival cruise  ship caught fire

and everything went wrong and it is awash with urine &shit, and the house band could only play hip-hop and the only thing they have to eat is onion sandwichs.......boy, that will teach those folks to accept a free trip from Fox News, huh!

boy...I gotz some catching up to do!!

what a long short trip it was....

shall we gather at the river,

where bright angel feet have trod, 

with its crystal tide forever

flowing by the throne of God? 

 Yes, we'll gather at the river, 
 the beautiful, the beautiful river; 
 gather with the saints at the river
 that flows by the throne of God. 

I think it was last Sunday night that I heard that old hymn ....through the morphine haze and the sounds of the hospital corridor.  I sang it once...wayz back in college when I was in a play called 'The Rimers of Eldritch" by Lanford Wislon.  Hadn't thought of it for years.  The gist of the play was ethical morality, which, thinking back was funny...cause in the middle of the play the leading actor, Chuck, took off with the leading actress, Sarah, and I started a bit of an affair with Chuck's wife, Sharon.  Hadn't thought of it all in years....but through the pain and the drugs and the strange hummmmmmm of the hospital heating system.....I thought of it again....how it became a sad drama within a sad drama.

OK...the short version of what it was, and how I got to that strange hazy time trippy drug induced memory hallucination was.... a slip on the ice.  And not one of those 'gees I fell on my bum and it hurtz' thingee ...npe.  It was a 9/11 crash smack dab down on the street... felt like Jesus ran me over on his way to a sale at Walmart.  Goddam Jesus!  Anywayz.....landed right on my ribs and the gist of it was a lung collapsed and I couldn't breathe....and phone calls were made....and the Ex ended up taking me to the Mergeny Door and they took an extra-Ray thingee and shaved my chest (damn near took my right nipple off doing it, too) and the Doctor what was in charge&stuff cut this small whole in my chest and stuck some big honking tube into me with great forge and vigor...like I was a vampire or somethingand then hooked me up to something or something that soounded like a Hoover rug cleaner and then they shot me up full of of morphine and shipped me off to a room to suffer.


On the margin of the river
washing up its silver spray,
we will walk and worship ever,
all the happy golden day. 

OK...had to take a break writing this...hey, gotz news ...pain hurts.  Sometimes a lot.  But, like Billa Lang says...write write write.

well, here;s the story.  Spent some time up in that there hospital....and some of the folks that took great of me were beyond great.  Maybe except for the woman who woke me at 3 am , after I finally fell asleep, to ask me if I was having trouble sleeping and did I want a pill.
The Student nurses that looked in on me were also very nice....wish I could remember their names.  They were both about 4'11" and were as funny as all get out.  When I told them that I,ah, was having trouble with,ah, bowel movements....they were absolutely delighted in the opportunity of giving me a suppositry. "Thank you very much," I replied,"but I have had a lotta experience getting things stuck up my ass.  I can mange.  Just leave it on the sink."  I swear, they were rather crest fallen.

The deal is, though, that pain is a lonely thing.  Doesn't matter what you broke, a leg, an arm, your heart, your lung, your toe, your hopes, dreams....it just plain hurts and it is all yours and no one else can truly understand or even come close to it.  You own it, whether you like it or not  One of the worst things you can do is say something like, "I know how you feel" or " it will get better".  Nasyt things to say, cause you know they don't understand and that after you have been truly hurt, you never quite get better.
Pain does make you think.
Made me think of all the hateful rhetoric pounding around the airwaves....hurtful stuff..."Guns don'kill, people do" is one of them.  Thought of those kids in CT and how the response from the far right wing was..." well, we gotz too many guns so there is nothing to do about it.  That hurtz.  I thought of how Karl Rove and his ilk offer nothing to fix America...only suggestions that THE NIGGER PRESIDENT ( oh trust me...that is all they are saying...they just disguise it badly in other ways) has gotta go.  I think of how Grover Norquist and the Koch Bros spread the great UNTRUTH that greed is good and 'US GREEDY Folks' will get you a job...pushing brooms and emptying out the trash right after we steal you last flat nickel.  Yessirree, Bob.....I reach for another vicodin to ease the pain...and close my eyes to drift beyond what hurts and I hear that old hymn again....and how long Sharon's fingers were and how peaceful and healing it would feel as she would run them down my cheek.
But healing is not what the radical right Republican's want....they want power and money.... When the President passed the Affordable Care Act....the rich and greedly were quick to change the name to "Obama Care"....only because it would be impolitic to call it what they really wanted to call it.."Nigger Care".... oh oh oh... they would if they could....but they can't and all they are interested in is the insurance companies and how much they make and how much they spend to lobby for.....more money.

....and golly gee, when they make more money they can build more insurance company buildings and fill them with people who write bills and for every bill those folks in those buildings...well....the money just keeps buiilding and building and then the rich and greedy can build more buildings and fill them with more folks that write bills......BUT...not a single person in any of those buildings make anyone WELL.
It really does hurt to think about it.  And when I think to much, I hear that song again.
Maybe we can get America Well Again...and maybe not.....but come spring, I will go down to the river and hope there is a God.....and that some day he will show up and share a beer with me.

 lay we every burden down; 

 grace our spirits will deliver, 
 and provide a robe and crown. 
 (Refrain) 

 Soon we'll reach the shining river, 
 soon our pilgrimage will cease;
 soon our happy hearts will quiver 
 with the melody of peace.

thanks to, and best wishes, Billa Lang 

wowzers.....four days in the hospital...not fun, but the drugs were good

Saturday last I slipped...and went...boom....to the tune of a punctured lung.  Five days, four nights.  Not funl  I guess it was bad enough when the nurse asks you in the morning... "Coffee" Jueice"  Morphine?


gonna be off the pages for awhile...... y'all have fun.