Friday, July 20, 2012

Billa Lang, Tequila.... and a little happy dance

Billa Lang is a card holding member of the Mafia of Clowns.  If there is such a thing.  If not, and I would mention it to him.... there is a good chance he would think it a good idea, start one, and then think of a way to make it profitable.  He is that kind of guy.
So he calls me late afternoon last Sunday.
"Where are you?" he shouts on the phone.
"I'm right here, " I honestly answer.
"Well, meet me there in ten minutes." And he hangs up.
What he means is Oblio's.  Oblio's is THERE.
What IT means is that he either had a GOOD day at an art show..... or a BAD day.  If it had been an OK day, he would have just gone home.

So I walk the few minutes THERE from HERE.  The place is empty, except for Sammy, the bartender, and she is kinda on the quiet side.  Billa walks in a few minutes later, looks at his watch and says, "You're early.  I said ten minutes and it is only 8 1/2!" He glances at Sammy and says, "A shot of Cuervo, 1880, Please."
"Lemon or Lime with that," She asks.
"Give him both, " I say.
Billa gives me an eye sneer and says, "I'm not that kinda guy.  Just a lime."

So, I'm thinking he didn't have a good day.  If it was a good day, he would have bought me one, too.
"Buy me a beer, " I say.  "I'm broke."
" Buy YOU a beer, " he says loudly. " you already owe me 137 and a half beers already!"
"How can I owe you half a beer?"
"I'll work on it!!!"
Now, see, Billa Lang does take nice photographs.... from his plane.  Aerial photography. "Best in Oshkosh." is what he says and I'm thinking the only aerial photographer in town. THEY ARE GOOD

.....So I ask him how sales were.
"Cheap goddam *&%G_**&!@"
" Not good, I take it"
"GOOD!  Huh....  a case of herpes would have been better! Two flat tires would have been better! NO NO NO.... a case of athletes foot ...ON BOTH FEET WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER!  Oh oh oh"
So he goes in the back and plays one of those electronic thingee gambling machines.  I never play them.  I have enough experience with losing than to deliberately throw money away.
Twenty minutes later he is dancing around and yelling, "yes yes yes"  He hit the machine for about $200.  His mood got better.  Bought me a beer.

"Hey, " he says.  "you haven't written much lately,"
"Can't think of much to say'" I say.
"Anything....write anything,  Write about going blind!"
I would have whacked him, but I would have missed.  Can't see well enough.  Could have just aimed for his laugh, which is, truly, hard to miss..... but that would have spoiled the fun....and that is the one thing that you get from Billa is just around the corner.... you just have to look for it.


Life As I Know It Now said...

It's good that you both can share the good times and the bad with each other. That's what friends are for :)

Sherry Peyton said...

Sounds like a great guy. We have those shots from planes of our meadow. I had one of my farm in Michigan, but somehow lost it. sigh...How are things coming with the fund raising? Are you scheduled for treatment?

Randal Graves said...

Have you thought about joining the army? I'm sure they're still looking for bodies. You can take advantage of their health care plan, then quit after basic training. It worked in Stripes, right?

Bluebirdblvd said...

Oh, man! Those are great photographs!

Now, explain to me how you end up owing someone *half* of a beer? And please keep writing. Your friend Bill Lang is right— more stories, please!

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